SELF-LOVE, SONGS AND WHISKEY

Discovering one-self and striving to become a better person every day is a task I take on wholeheartedly. It has gotten easier over time, but every now and then, a bit of the past sneaks its way to the forefront of the mind and takes over. It is within these moments that your greatest power is yourself. The decisions you make in those moments can set the course for your growth and your lessons, or so I’ve learned.

After years and years of toxic relationship after toxic relationship (both romantic and non-romantic), I have found myself in the calmest and most forgiving state of being that I have ever been in. How did I get there you ask? Well, through self-love, songs, and whiskey.

Self-Love

The hardest task I’ve endeavoured on has been the journey of self-love. It is a never-ending journey and takes A LOT of strength, will and determination (…and Grace, too). At least for me it did and DOES.

I’ve let some wonderful people who have entered my life go because I wasn’t ready for them. As excusal as that may seem, it is also very true. I’ve stopped myself from eating A LOT of REALLY delicious looking food because of my negative upbringing and relationship with food – it’s a work in progress, okay? I’ve continued to put others needs and wants above mine, like way above. Though I will never stop helping others, I have learned to balance and make sure I take care of myself as well. This is the most important message.

I mention all the above, because I know that it is relatable, but also to note that I have been steadily working on the root cause of all of those situations. At the end of the day, we are all simply human, and it’s nearly impossible to be perfect. So let us use this as a reminder to be kinder to ourselves and each other. 

I hope to one day be free of the anxieties surrounding all these issues and so many more as I continue my self-care and self-love journey- it’s possible. It’s okay to not be “okay”.

body-love
microphone-butterfly

Songs

The journey a single song can take you on can be a completely euphoric, magical and therapeutic experience.

Recently, I was introduced to song called “Dead of Night” by Orville Peck. Instantly I was taken by this song. The steady, simple tempo and haunting pace of the guitar at the beginning of the song grabs my attention right away. As soon as he starts singing, I am taken to a deep place in my soul that feels like it is being gently hugged. I have a therapeutic experience with this song and end up shedding a few tears of emotional relief. I then proceed to listen to the song another 4 or 5 times, ha-ha!

Music is universal and songs tell a story. We often turn to music and song to support an emotion that we are feeling. I will always remember songs that got me through the toughest times. I will always remember the songs that made memories with the people I love. I will always be thankful to the lyrics that were written to articulate my emotions when I couldn’t. 

What song(s) sticks out in your mind? How did it make you feel? I’d love to know.

Whiskey

This isn’t to glorify alcohol by any means, but I do love a little whiskey a couple times a week. Ha-ha! Keeps the heart warm and the mind strong. Whiskey is also the name of a character I made up in my mind. She is fierce, she is strong, she is full of colour and she can do anything. 

She is self-love, she is song, she is whiskey. 

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Rediscovering my passionate vigour for singing and music in general has brought a new depth to my artistry and lyrical expression. As mentioned in my previous and first blog post, I released a song call, “The Way I Feel” in August 2021. I leave you today with the lyrics to that song, and send my best wishes to you.  

 

 

The Way I Feel

Lyrics and Melody: Vanessa Lio

Music and Production: Adam Bertucci – Cugini Hub © 2021


If ever there was such a way

To explain the way I feel

You left me feeling helpless

I was in such distress

It took some time to heal


My life it was such a mess

Couldn’t tell the make believe from real

Now I see no darkness

Got my moral compass

The value’s in my appeal


The Way I Feel x2


Manipulation is your specialty

Oh, your narcissistic ways

Caused me so much drama

Developed into trauma

It took some time to heal


Now my life it is so blessed

Everything around me is so real

Now I see no darkness

Got my moral compass

The value’s in my appeal


The way I feel

7 Responses

  1. It’s exactly how i think about those things. I am fine with the fact that I ain’t fine. Unfortunately both men and women are vulnerable to toxic relationships and especially the caring kind. If you are kind, then people see you as weak, and if you are not, then you are rude or something else. It always comes down to labeling. If you are a good person, then people see you as boring. I figured that basically no matter what I do I will be labeled, and it’s a game you’ll never win, unless you let go and don’t care about how other people see you, so be yourself. To mention that the dating game has changed tremendously over the years, so with all those dating apps, dating in the Western world has become easier just with the sweep of a finger you could go on a date, but not all people like this, because sometimes it fails miserably.

    I drink Cognac and make music just to get through life and not think, because over thinking could lead to a lot of health problems, and I mean physically and mentally. Learning to love yourself is the start to a good path in life. Then again don’t forget that your perfect other half might be on his way to your life to change things.

    1. Hey Marshall! I love this. It is all so TRUE! You have to love yourself first in order for ANYTHING else to work or make sense. I also choose to be myself, and those who like it, will. Thanks for such a wonderful response. Wishing you a great day.

      1. I agree! Love yourself and everything else will fall into place. I wish you a great day. Take it easy Vanessa. 🙂

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7 Responses

  1. It’s exactly how i think about those things. I am fine with the fact that I ain’t fine. Unfortunately both men and women are vulnerable to toxic relationships and especially the caring kind. If you are kind, then people see you as weak, and if you are not, then you are rude or something else. It always comes down to labeling. If you are a good person, then people see you as boring. I figured that basically no matter what I do I will be labeled, and it’s a game you’ll never win, unless you let go and don’t care about how other people see you, so be yourself. To mention that the dating game has changed tremendously over the years, so with all those dating apps, dating in the Western world has become easier just with the sweep of a finger you could go on a date, but not all people like this, because sometimes it fails miserably.

    I drink Cognac and make music just to get through life and not think, because over thinking could lead to a lot of health problems, and I mean physically and mentally. Learning to love yourself is the start to a good path in life. Then again don’t forget that your perfect other half might be on his way to your life to change things.

    1. Hey Marshall! I love this. It is all so TRUE! You have to love yourself first in order for ANYTHING else to work or make sense. I also choose to be myself, and those who like it, will. Thanks for such a wonderful response. Wishing you a great day.

      1. I agree! Love yourself and everything else will fall into place. I wish you a great day. Take it easy Vanessa. 🙂

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